This is not easy for me to say.

At first we were so happy. We spent countless hours together. Your curves seemed to fit my body so well.

But lately things have been different. I no longer feel comfortable with you. You rub me the wrong way and force me into awkward positions. Sometimes you cause me pain, especially when the road gets rocky. Other times you numb me to the world.

You see, I’m not sure that I’ll ever be able to have children with you.

I’ve been checking out other prospects. My eyes are drawn to my friend’s choices. Last weekend, I stopped by that place downtown to see what was on display. I even gave your sister a whirl, but I can’t bear the family resemblance.

After weeks of searching, I decided to send away by mail order. Your replacement is sleeker, lighter and a little exotic.

I’ll probably take you out a few more times, but this is the end.

Don’t take it personally. It’s me that’s changed. I know I’ve sunk lower and gotten more aggressive, but you’ve remained just as harsh and inflexible as the day we met.